Thursday, March 17, 2011

i like the single life .

Do you remember when we first met? The way you looked I can't forget. I waved at you, and you smiled. It felt just like a heart attack.
 
No crying moments. No mind- bugging quarrels. No partner to think about. But it feels better when you have someone taking care of you. Thinking about you, honestly, sweetly, faithfully and securely loving you. I miss no one. I just miss the feeling of being taken cared by a special someone.
Wanting you happy was always more important than wanting you.
If you really knew me, you’d realize I’m not the girl I was before. I’ve been hurt, walked all over, used, and frowned apon. I still have hope for new relationships. But, if you really knew me, you’d know I’m scared to death of falling in love again. I’m scared to death of getting hurt. I’m scared to death of getting attached and thrown to the side again.
And I’d be lying if I told you I never knew it was coming. But I’m tired of lying and I’m sick of trying. We both know it wasn’t worth it, I need to hear it, and you need to say it.
 looking at you just makes me sad. it doesn't give me comfort anymore. i was always so happy that i finally found someone that was like me, that understood me unlike everyone else in this world. and we were "lucky" and everyone looked at us in awe. they were jealous of what we had. now look at us. we're right next to each other and have nothing to say because it all just hurts soo much from everything we've been through.
 I've never been the girl to stay in relationships for long.  There could be many reasons for this, like maybe I like the chase & the games more than the boys.  I could love them as much as a girl my age could, but when I do get into the relationship, the fun is gone, and I’m bored.  Which causes me to break up with them.  Or maybe I don't show my feelings enough, Like not caring as much as they do, which pushes them away.  I'm just not a person to show many feelings with boys, cause I hate the attention being on me.  Or maybe the reason is I’m just never good enough at pleasing them…
      it hurts even more when you look in the mirror and realize who’s staring back at you is the reason why he’s not there.
She can deal with stress and carry heavy burdens. She smiles when she feels like screaming and she sings when she feels like crying. She cries when she’s happy and laughs when she’s afraid. Her love is unconditional. There’s only one thing wrong with her,. She forgets what she’s worth.
Everybody has that point in their life where you hit a crossroads and you've had a bunch of bad days and there's different ways you can deal with it and the way I dealt with it was I just turned completely to music which washed all of the bottled up emotional problems away.
You moved me. Not literally-you obviously didn't pick me up and place me in a different place then I was before-but you touched my heart in ways that nobody ever has before. You truly taught me who I am and what I've done wrong. I trust you. You trust me. And that's all that matters. Because you're someone that has touched my heart and made me believe in myself in ways that nobody ever has before, thank you for once being my everything.
onnne dayyy my wiittle babbby is going to have a sweeet dadddy like this .
pleasssseee giiiveee emeee thiiis doooogggy !!! i wannnnt onnne .